i never was really big on those new years resolutions… but every year around this time i do find myself thinking about what they could/should be. this year, too. and again i decided to not set rules or goals for myself, that i may or may not honor for more than a couple of months…. instead i decided to continue, or further develop trades that i like about myself or others, and things that have worked for me. such as…
in my series of "beauties", i wanted this special lady to get her own post.... i met her in khao luang national park in nakhon si thammarat province, thailand. even though we did not speak a word of the each other's language we both immediately fell in love with echother.... especially after discovering our shared love for bracelets.
i met her in khao luang national park in nakhon si thammarat province, thailand. even though we did not speak a word of the each other's language we both immediately fell in love with each other.... especially after discovering our shared love for bracelets.
i have always thought a lot about time... even more since i have started my life as a vagabond. discussions with myself or other people could be endless..... (so i will try to get to the point)
time has always defined ultimate luxury for me... time to do what you really want to do.
yesterday (that also marked my one-month-vagabonding) i thought about it a lot. when a friend (from ny) recommended a book to me, i responded (like i have heard many people say) "i would like to read more, but i just don't have the time....". anyway i bought the book (because i trust his recommendation... and i wanted to maaaake time to read). i always loved the vision of myself lying on the beach for hours... reading. i carried just kids, by patti smith for me for one month... and have layed at a couple of thai beaches on the way.... until i finally made this vision come true. and what feeling did i have, as i walked across the sand searching for the perfect spot for my towel, only armed with my book and sunnglasses? ......guilt.
by nature (it's a leo-thing, i have been told) i often have the fear of missing out. as a vagabond i can be am exactly where i want to be, and have the luxury of time to move slowly. yesterday, on the beach i found myself debating about if i should really spend the day doing..... nothing. laying on the beach and reading. was that nothing? it should be eeeverything.... since i have told myself many times that i have always wanted this. but still.... was i wasting my time when i should/could be using it more efficiently?
i fought the urge to shake the sand off my book and towel and swap them with my laptop (to upload more photos) or my phone (to text or instagram...). i really got into my book which (as a "lexy" (as my sister calls me lovingly, to describe my dyslexic-ness) is (unfortunately) rare. i was no longer filled with guilt. the book inspired me... i was happy with the thoughts i was having between the pages (some of which you just read about)..... i enjoyed that patti's words reminded me of my life in new york... as well as my friend (who had recommended inspired me to read this book, that was giving me so much)...... and i was proud of myself for reading waaay more than 2 pages.
that's it for now..... but, even now, the thoughts on time and how to spend it are racing through my mind, and you will probably be reading/seeing/hearing more about it.
yesterday i knew... even before getting out of bed... that it was going to be one of those days..... the kind of day (i have some times) where nothing will be to my satisfaction......... my morning cappuccino... my outfit... other people........
(when i was honest to myself) i did quickly realized that i was actually unsatisfied with myself.... (basically the opposite ofthis). i looked around and found myself in a place that could easily be compared to paradise and i felt silly for feeling any kind of discomfort at all. i paused and felt the sun on my skin and it automatically put a smile on my face.
some days are just a bit off..... and that is natural........ as long as you (as my mom would say) "snap out of it". look around you will seelittle things that make you smile... beauty is everywhere.